How to deal with the urge to snoop through your partner’s phone

CHARLOTTE — Have you or your partner had the urge to snoop or pry into each other’s personal messages and apps?

If so, you certainly are not alone.

Channel 9′s Elsa Gillis spoke with a therapist about what you may want to consider doing instead.

According to a survey from consumer comparison website Whistle Out, more than 30% of Americans admit to snooping through their partner’s phones.

And more than 58% admitted thinking the action was okay.

Therapist Dr. Clifford Matthews Jr. said it’s an issue he sees come up in counseling sessions with numerous couples.

“I think that when one snoops, it is never a good thing. Now there is a situation or the reality that for some couples, past infidelity is a real thing. But the way to deal with that is to establish a really solid communication plan,” Matthews said.

Matthews also said snooping could be a sign of other problems.

“I do think that sometimes snooping does point to some feelings of low self-valuation. It can also point to patterns of manipulation and control,” Matthews explained.

Ultimately, Matthews felt snooping could be used as an opportunity to have a conversation with your partner.

“What are the communication strategies? How do you, and what boundaries do you have in place? And then, how do you address feelings? That you feel there’s something happening, but you don’t have to have a snoop? If you feel it, how do you speak it?” Matthews continued.

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