CHARLOTTE — Tamara Bodrick says she has three relatives buried at Oaklawn Cemetery, one of the seven cemeteries the city of Charlotte owns and operates: her mother, grandmother, and brother.
She says she leaves decorations for her mother, grandmother, and brother at their graves -- things like flowers and teddy bears. But sometimes -- the items disappeared.
“[My mother] had this big cross that my grandma, when she was living, had bought for my mom and put on her grave. And when I came up here, it was gone,” Bodrick said. “I actually rolled around the graveyard like who removed my mom‘s stuff? And there was a crew out here... and I said, ‘What happened to the cross that was out here?’ And they told me they threw it away.”
She says they got it out of the trash and put it back. “We come here because we miss them, we want to just visit, maybe sit or whatever,” she said. “I can’t explain to them the importance of that ground.”
Speaking of the ground, she added, “The dirt was like dug up. It was a big gash across the top of my mom‘s grave.” She says she complained. “And they assured me that it wouldn’t happen again because they understood the sacred ground for the families, but here we are again.”
The City of Charlotte emailed Action 9: “Cemetery crews conduct scheduled cleanup efforts twice a year, typically in March and October, to remove decorations, flowers, or trinkets that have become damaged, weather-worn, or unsightly. In addition to these scheduled cleanups, if crews are working in an area and observe items that are deteriorated or pose maintenance concerns, those items may also be removed at that time. These efforts help ensure cemeteries remain safe, respectful, and properly maintained.
Decorations may be removed if they are damaged, unsightly, pose a maintenance or safety concern, or interfere with cemetery operations. Routine cleanup is necessary to maintain the overall appearance of the cemetery and to support ongoing burial and maintenance activities.
Each City-operated cemetery has its own rules and regulations regarding decorations. Families are encouraged to contact the cemetery office directly for the specific guidelines that apply to their location. In general, families are advised to tidy gravesites within 30 days of placing decorations. Items placed directly on the ground are more susceptible to damage or removal during routine maintenance. Decorations placed in permanent vases are typically not disturbed unless they have been in place for an extended period of time and show significant deterioration.
Cemetery crews may need to drive over gravesites in order to perform essential operations such as conducting burials, installing markers, or setting foundations. While this is sometimes unavoidable, crews are expected to minimize disruption. If damage occurs as a result of cemetery operations, it should be repaired in a timely manner. Families who believe a gravesite has been damaged are encouraged to contact the cemetery office so the issue can be reviewed and addressed.
Flowers and trinkets left on the ground may be damaged, displaced, or blown away due to weather or routine maintenance activities. Using permanent vases when available can help reduce the risk of damage. If families have questions or concerns, they are encouraged to contact the cemetery office directly. While burials are the City’s first priority, staff are committed to treating every gravesite with care and respect."
Action 9 attorney Jason Stoogenke says the takeaway here is that you have to be your family’s own best advocate.
Each City-operated cemetery has its own rules about decorations. Make sure you know the specific guidelines for ‘your’ loved one’s location.
Again, in general, the cemetery expects you to “tidy up gravesites within 30 days of placing decorations.” Items on the ground are more likely to get thrown away or ruined. Decorations in vases, it’s usually the opposite case.
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